Disjunction Junction

Okay, so it's been a while. I am not in a good mood this week, so here's the good news in quick easy sound bites.

* The newspaper ran an article on me yesterday. It brought in a bit of business, but somewhere a high school english teacher is beating their head on their desk wondering how in heck they failed to teach this reporter how to write a cohesive paragraph. Seriously, I could have done better half-asleep and strung out on kool-aid powder. At least the interview was fun...

* The health inspector finally showed up yesterday. After giving me an entire month to get paranoid over some of the vague warnings he gave me last visit, he breezed through the shop in ten minutes and gave it full marks. Only thing he had to say was to kick the fridge down a couple degrees. Glad it's over, but feh.... Yeah yeah, I'm gonna hear lots of "but it's not his fault you're a paranoid wackadoo, Ron"... Do yourself a favor and save it.

* I got a call last week from the MDA people (the yabbos behind "Jerry's Kids"), apparently they're doing some fundraiser where they take local celebrities and lock them up in a fancy restaurant for an hour in the hopes that their friends will shell out big bucks to 'bail them out'... Some deluded person gave them my name, which means that they didn't do their research. They're assuming that A) I have friends, and B) my friends have money. I agreed, since it could actually be fun and I'll at least get lunch out of it. The packet I got in the mail yesterday assumes that I'm going to go around to everyone I know begging for donations. Yeah right... I may get around to putting out a jar for donations in the shop, but I'm not going to do these people's job for them.

And bottom line, I don't care about Jerry's Kids any more than I do about Jerry himself. Sending them to summer camp is not gonna find a cure for muscular dystrophy, which is what these kids really need. Now, if someone comes up with a program to send intelligent, hard-working normal kids to camp, I'm there. One of the few things I actually learned in grade school was that bad kids get a lot more rewards and attention than the good ones ever will, and that's always turned my crank something fierce. So, if I ever become rich, that's where the charity budget will be going.

Yeah, so things don't seem to be going badly right now. Big deal. I'm still feeling grouchy as heck, and given half a chance I'd blow up the world in hopes of making something better the second time around. Aren't you glad you came?